I, Claudius

Episode 1 A Touch of Murder

In this opening episode, which takes place in Rome in 24 BC, it is seven years since the battle of Actium and three years since the Roman Senate acclaimed Octavian (Augustus' real name) as Emperor. Rome is finally at peace after nearly three decades of disastrous civil wars, first between Julius Caesar and Pompey and then between Octavian and Mark Antony and Cleopatra.

Marcellus is in high favor, not only with Augustus, but also with the Roman populace. At the dinner party celebrating the anniversary of the battle there is an obvious rivalry between Marcellus and Agrippa. Soon after, Agrippa reacts by requesting an assignment in the east. The Emperor reluctantly agrees. When Augustus is on an inspection trip to Greece and Octavia and Julia are out of town on a holiday, Livia sees her chance to strike. When Marcellus falls ill with stomach flu, she takes over as nurse and cook. Mysteriously, he only gets worse.

Octavia and Julia are finally informed and rush back to Rome, but it's too late - Marcellus dies of 'food poisoning'. "There is a lot of that going around", says Livia. Augustus is informed by letter. The people of Rome erupt in demonstrations and near riots. There is no other recourse but to recall Agrippa to Rome to help Augustus govern. But, there's a price that Agrippa asks - to have Julia as his wife. Livia is furious. She had plans for Julia and Tiberius, but now Agrippa is in the way.

Episode 2 Family Affairs

This episode takes place between 13 and 10 BC. It's been a decade since Julia was married to Marcus Agrippa, during which she was apparently happy and frequently pregnant (she had five children with him in their nine years together). Agrippa, however, became expendable and died mysteriously (poison?). Thus, the way is finally cleared for Tiberius to step in. Livia forces him (reluctantly) to divorce his wife, Vipsania, and marry Julia.

The opening scenes take place at the Roman baths where Drusus and Tiberius are working out and then cleaning up. Tiberius is clearly unhappy as Augustus' assistant -- errand boy might be more appropriate according to him - and as Julia's husband. He has 'black thoughts' and resents his mothers' schemes. Drusus is about to go off to the Rhine frontier. He predicts a return to the Republic after Augustus retires.

The wives are together in a separate part of the baths getting a rub down. Julia establishes herself as self indulgent and sexually liberal while Antonia is clearly traditional and conservative. Julia implies that Tiberius has deviant sexual tastes, which she could probably stand if only he would pay more attention to her.

Tiberius has been mooning all around town over Vipsania and has even visited her at her house secretly. When Augustus finds out about this he is both publicly embarrassed and privately irate, but Livia gets Tiberius off the hook by claiming that she knew of the visit. A letter arrives from Drusus, which expresses frank, almost treasonable Republican sentiments. Unfortunately, Livia reads it. He also tells of a minor wound and Livia immediately dispatches her personal doctor to treat him. In spite of the doctor's 'best efforts', gangrene sets in and Drusus dies.

Augustus now openly favors his grandsons, Gaius and Lucius, over Tiberius. After a dinner at which everyone seems to have had too much wine, Julia and Tiberius have a fight over Vipsania. At the end of this, Tiberius calls her a 'fat, drunken cow' and slaps her. Augustus is livid and banishes Tiberius.

Episode 3 Waiting in the Wings

This episode takes place between 2 BC and 4 AD. Tiberius is living on Rhodes in the eastern Mediterranean while Julia is alone and 'active' in Rome. Freed from the supervision of a husband, Julia has abandoned herself to sensual pleasures. Tiberius remains unforgiven by Augustus, who apparently is the only man in Rome unaware of Julia's indulgences. (Her behavior was particularly scandalous since Augustus had implemented laws requiring a husband [or father] to reveal and punish an adulterous wife.)

A letter arrives for Tiberius from his mother. "The answer, I'm afraid, is no.", to his return to Rome. Gaius has died inexplicably of wounds received in the East, but his brother Lucius has been promoted to command the Roman army in Spain. Julia remains the scandal of Rome.

Lucius and his friend, Plautius, call on Julia to bid farewell. Julia gives Plautius a little 'gift' in the privacy of her room. Back on the patio, the children are playing. Suddenly, an eagle drops a wolf-cub, which is caught by Claudius. A priest interprets the sign. Rome too will one day be wounded and Claudius will protect it.

Later, in the Palace, Plautius is confronted by Livia and recruited as her spy on Julia. Augustus, meanwhile, is lecturing a group on nobles on Roman morality. We are introduced at this point to young Herod Agrippa and also get a closer look at poor limping, stammering, and twitching Claudius.

Julia continues her wanton ways, seemingly with half the male population of the city - but now under the watchful eyes of Plautius. The list (a long one) is finally given to Livia and from her to Lucius, whom she convinces to inform Augustus. Augustus confronts the assembled men who confess to the affairs. Augustus is devastated. He disavows Julia and banishes her for life to a barren island in the Mediterranean (Pandateria).

Augustus still resists recalling Tiberius, but when Lucius is killed in a 'boating accident' while en route to Spain there is no one else to turn to. At last, Tiberius returns to Rome to become Caesar's assistant and heir - along with Julia's youngest son, Postumus……..

Episode 4 What shall we do about Claudius?

This episode takes place between 4 AD and 10 AD. It opens with a tipsy Claudius remembering a family dinner. Everyone except Castor is there. They are stuffed and drowsy and half-listening to the famous Roman author and poet, Horace. Augustus lavishly praises Horace and criticizes Ovid (not present). Ovid is "too smutty", he says. (Ovid is chiefly remembered for the sensuality of his writing. He was later banished to Tomi on the Black Sea by Augustus, perhaps in retaliation for his role in Augustus' granddaughter's adulteries.)

Claudius is obviously an embarrassment to everyone and he stammers and twitches as he and the other guests depart. There's a brief discussion of what to do with him at the upcoming games when a courier arrives from Germany. Disaster has stuck the Roman Army on the Rhine! The Germans drew Quintilius Varus and the 17th, 18th and 19th Legions into an ambush. The Army has been slaughtered, nearly to the last man. Only Cassius Chaerea and a little band of 120 men managed to cut their way back to the Rhine bridges. (80 made it.) The Roman provinces in Gaul lay open to plunder by the Germans. Tiberius is dispatched with the few available units. More troops will follow as they are raised, equipped and trained.

Meanwhile, we get to see more of Claudius. He meets the famous Roman historians Pollio and Livy in the library. He displeases Livy by overcorrecting him in his search for a manuscript. Then, in his conversation with Pollio, he's told that his father was poisoned. Pollio gives him good advice. "If you want to survive, exaggerate your stammer and twitch. No one will think you're worth killing." He inadvertently follows this advice at the games in honor of his father. After bumbling his way around the Imperial Box, he faints at the brutality of the gladiators.

At Livia's suggestion, Germanicus is sent to the Rhine with reinforcements for Tiberius. (To get him out of town?) Livia's spies have established the clandestine meetings between Postumus and Livilla. Livia confronts Livilla with this and draws her into a plot against Postumus.

Livilla secretly invites Postumus to her room and when he gets there, fakes an attempted rape. In spite of Postumus' explanation, Augustus believes Livilla and banishes him to "a small rock". Before he can be shipped off, however, he slips the guard and tells Claudius all before he's recaptured.

At the end of this episode, Claudius finally gets married. They all meet the bride at the ceremony. She is Urgulanilla - well over six feet tall. Everyone bursts out in laughter except the stoic bride and groom.

Episode 5 Poison is Queen

This episode takes place in 14 AD. It opens with Claudius rummaging through a barrel of old documents and finding Augustus' last will. He remembers Augustus' final year…..

The Germans have at last been suppressed and Germanicus has returned to Rome to a triumph and the accolades of the Senate. Later, he and his brother, Claudius, are alone on the patio. Claudius finally has the chance to pass on the truth about the false charge of attempted rape that was brought by their sister Livilla against Postumus. Further, he reveals his suspicions about Livia's spies and plots to further the career of Tiberius. Germanicus must tell Augustus, who would never have believed Claudius.

Apparently, Augustus believes the story. He inexplicably plans a trip to Corsica, which will take him right past 'the rock' where Postumus has been confined these past four years. He's coy about the trip, which raises Livia's suspicions. This is especially so since he hates sea voyages, but appears to anticipate this one joyfully. Livilla denies having said a word, but who else could know the truth? Surely not 'poor twitching, stupid Claudius.'

Augustus makes the trip with his trusted friend, Quintus Flavius Maximus, and sure enough they stop secretly to see Postumus. Postumus is understandably angry and Augustus is appropriately repentant and the two reconcile. Postumus will be recalled and his inheritance as heir will be reinstated, but first Augustus must lay the groundwork with the Senate. Livia suspects something is up and cons the Chief Vestal into allowing her to see the secretly revised will.

Augustus' health begins to fail. He's struck by severe stomach pain and is convinced by a series of 'signs' that his end is near. Nevertheless, he nurses himself back to health and has a chance to thank Claudius for his part in rectifying the situation. He's been wrong about Claudius all these years.

While playing dice with a group of friends, Augustus has a sudden attack of severe stomach pain. He refuses to eat anything but the figs he has picked from the tree himself. The doctor briefs Livia and she fondles a fig in a mysterious, bemused way. Augustus finally slips into death as Livia, in the background, explains her rationale. Tiberius arrives at the last and she goes to brief the deputation from the Senate. "Don't touch the figs.", she tells him.

Livia's agents, including the infamous Sejanus, are dispatched to do in Postumus and witnesses to Augustus' late change of heart. Tiberius is at last acclaimed by the Senate as the new Caesar.

Episode 6 Some Justice

This episode takes place in 19 AD - Tiberius has been Emperor for five years. It opens with Claudius in the privy, remembering the death of his brother. Germanicus and his family were stationed in the East (in Antioch, Syria). He fell inexplicably ill and grew worse. There were many unexplainable signs of doom and impending death that appeared throughout his house. In spite of Agrippina's efforts to protect him, he finally died - the victim of poison. But, who did it? The answer, according to Agrippina's accusations, is Tiberius and Livia through their political appointee, Piso and his wife Plancina.

The Roman populace apparently agrees with Agrippina. They are demonstrating outside the Palace as Tiberius gets the news from Sejanus that charges will be brought in the Senate by his son, Castor. The couple is to be charged with murder and treason. A key witness against them is the notorious poisoner, Martina, who is secretly brought to Rome by Agrippina's faction. Piso is confident of acquittal - he has letters from Tiberius that support his actions. They're sealed, of course, and the Imperial Seal can't be broken without the Emperor's consent. (Heavens! Executive Privilege in ancient Rome! Shades of WhiteWater!) Plancina isn't so sure. Tiberius seems so cold and unsupportive.

Meanwhile, we get several views of the young Caligula. What a brat! He's a whiner who always gets his own way, even if he would much rather sleep with his sister than his cousin. His Grandmother, Antonia, is outraged when she finds the siblings together in the buff. Claudius lectures the young boy about the special place sisters have in the scheme of things, but somehow we don't think this has sunk in.

Back at the trial, Tiberius refuses to have the letters read to the Senate and later sends his Commander of the Praetorian Guard, Sejanus, to retrieve them from Piso. No problem though, Piso has another unsealed letter from Livia. Still, things are not going well for the defense and Plancina separates her case from her husband's. Privately, she counsels an honorable suicide to protect the family name and fortune. (Traitors had their estates seized by the government, but suicides did not.)

Livia attempts to intercede with Tiberius on Plancina's behalf, but Tiberius won't have it. "No deal!", he tells her. So, Livia encourages Plancina to handle her husband herself. She does. A joint suicide is the only way out. They sit together and he draws his dagger. But, he can't do it. Plancina will show him what Romans are made of. As she prepares to do herself in, she suddenly turns and 'accidentally' buries it in him instead.

The case is closed. The incriminating letter is returned to Livia (to be burned) and Plancina goes free. As a precursor of things to come, Caligula sets fire to the family villa in the closing scene.

Episode 7 Queen of Heaven

This episode takes place in 26 AD - Tiberius is now in his late sixties and unloved by the people in spite of his efforts for Rome. He also, apparently, has begun to practice some deviant behavior. At dinner party given by a Roman matron, Lollia, and her husband, she relates a summons to the palace for her daughter. Tiberius made a blatant, perverted pass at the daughter. To save her, Lollia offered herself instead. Tiberius accepted the offer. Now she can't live with the memory, so in front of all the assembled guests, Lollia takes her own life.

Tiberius, having grown resentful over his mother's meddling, has some time since ousted her from government and his life. They are barely on speaking terms. Instead, Tiberius has come to rely more and more on the advice and counsel of the Commander of the Praetorian Guard, Sejanus. He has spies everywhere and uncovers one treasonable plot after another. This, of course, vastly increases his power. There are even copies of his bust being sold all over Rome.

Castor and Tiberius argue over the influence that Sejanus has. Castor obviously holds Sejanus in disdain. Little does he know that his wife and Sejanus are lovers. She evens drugs Castor to have an evening with Sejanus. Perhaps a stronger drug can take him out permanently and then the lovers could be together forever.

On Livia's birthday, Tiberius presents her with her horoscope. "To know how much longer I have to put up with her." (The answer is less than a year.) She has invited Claudius to dinner. Very unusual. In the past, she could barely stand the sight of him. Caligula is also there. To show his confidence in her, Claudius chugs a goblet of wine. She makes both of them promise to make her a goddess. After Caligula leaves, she reveals why. She admits to the long list of eliminations to "avoid another civil war" which Augustus would have brought on with his favoritism. Mortals go to hell for what she's done, but goddesses get forgiven and go to heaven. She gives Claudius a scroll of suppressed Sibylline Verses, which predict Caligula, and then Claudius will follow Tiberius as Emperor.

Sejanus and Livilla carry out their plan to eliminate Castor. They even flaunt the relationship as he lies on his deathbed. To further his rise in status, Sejanus tells Claudius that his wife, Urgulanilla, is pregnant. "It's got nothing to do with me." Claudius says. He's talked into divorcing her to marry Sejanus' sister. Claudius agrees. "You blockhead!", Antonia says later.

Finally, Livia is dying. Caligula repudiates his promise, but Claudius reaffirms his. When she slips away, Claudius places a coin in her mouth "to pay the ferryman for the journey."

Episode 8 Reign of Terror

This episode takes place between 29 and 31 AD - Tiberius is now in his seventies and, tired of the constant criticisms of the Senate and the people, he has gone into self- imposed seclusion on the isle of Capri in the Bay of Naples. His agent in communicating with the Senate and in running the government is Sejanus.

Sejanus is now divorced and is still Livilla's lover, but they aren't married yet. His ex-wife visits Livilla's mother, Antonia, to plea for her help in getting custody of the children. While she's there she also threatens to make the poisoning of Castor public, but Antonia can't believe it's true. Claudius inadvertently spills the beans about Livilla's role in framing Postumus. Poor Antonia. All this going on about her and she seems to be the only one who doesn't know.

Sejanus applies to Tiberius for permission to marry Livilla, but the Emperor reluctantly turns him down. It would be "too an exalted position" for him. However, Tiberius wouldn't object to a marriage to Helen, her daughter. When Sejanus tells her, Livilla obviously has a fit over this and tries to attack him but he at last calms her down.

Meanwhile, Agrippina and her son, Nero, have been arrested. She's brought to the Emperor in handcuffs and confronts him about the political persecutions of his (and Sejanus') opponents. He banishes her to Pandateria, the same little island where Augustus sent her mother. But, before she goes he flogs her. Back in the Senate, Sejanus secures a vote against Drusus, her other son, who is then thrown in the dungeon.

Claudius thinks Caligula is next and tries to warn him of "grave danger" but Caligula shrugs it off. It's apparent that he doesn't think much of his mother and brothers. But, he loves his sisters…..

Sejanus' arrogant sister (and Claudius' new wife) drops by to see Livilla and bumps in to Claudius and Antonia. In private, Livilla gives her a letter to Sejanus that insists that they move against the Emperor. A bit later Antonia is recycling waste paper from Livilla's room and discovers the incriminating drafts of the letter. But, how to get them to Tiberius? Sejanus screens all his mail. She and Claudius paste the evidence inside the scrolls of a history that Claudius wrote and smuggle them to Tiberius.

Tiberius is distraught at the news of Sejanus' treachery. How to get to him when he controls all the soldiers in Rome? Caligula hits on the solution. "Get a dog who'll eat a dog." He knows just the guy - Macro, the second in Command. Together, they draw up the plan.

Sejanus is tricked into going to the Senate, thinking he's about to be promoted. Instead, he charged with treason and arrested by Macro and his own little band of loyal guards. Macro executes Sejanus in his cell and supervises that of his children too. The girl is deflowered first and the boy dressed in his manly clothes since it's against Roman tradition to kill a virgin or children.

Livilla gets her own special punishment. Antonia locks her in her room and posts herself outside the door "until she dies. That's her punishment and this is mine."

Rome goes into a frenzy against Sejanus' friends and agents and the streets run red. Sejanus' body was thrown to the mob and paraded around the city, dragged by a meat hook. At the end, his body and those of many of his followers were thrown down the steps by the Tiber to be dumped later unceremoniously into the river.

Episode 9 Zeus, by Jove

This episode takes place in 37 AD - Tiberius is on his deathbed. Macro listens for a heartbeat and, removing the Imperial ring to give to Caligula, pronounces him dead. As Caligula is announcing the death, a slave bursts in. "He's alive again!", he cries. Macro goes to check, lifts Tiberius into bed and smothers him with the pillow. Caligula tells the assembled Senators that he's "definitely dead." They fall all over themselves to hail the new Caesar.

At first, Caligula appears to be a great Emperor. He says he has burned the informant records of Sejanus (which he really didn't do) and is giving 'bread and circuses' to the people. But, he's spending the money in Treasury like there's no tomorrow. He selects Claudius to be Consul with him. That's a surprise to everyone, but Caligula says not to worry, he'll do all the thinking. He is angry with Gemellus for his irritating cough. A huge migraine comes over him and he collapses on the floor. Macro announces that he's in a coma.

The Senators are all gathered awaiting news and Lentulus, an opportunistic Senator, lets it be known that he's offered the gods his own life in place of Caligula's if only they will spare him. (Bad move!) When he recovers, Caligula thinks that he has become a god. Claudius is summoned and correctly guesses the new situation and plays up to him, escaping execution. He brags that he's done many godly things, like putting down a mutiny when he was 2 and killing his own father (Germanicus) when he was 10. And, he's slept with all three of his sisters. Oh yes, Drusilla has become a goddess too.

The divine pair are greeted by the assembled Senators. Caligula thanks Lentulus for his offer. Now "what are you going to do about it. I'm still here and you're still here and we both shouldn't be….." Later, Caligula and Drusilla are in the Temple of Jove. Caligula 'talks' to Jove and Hera, insulting them as inferior. Drusilla reveals that she's pregnant. It will be a glorious baby, the result of the union of two of the newest and most powerful gods.

Later, Caligula has sent Macro to 'cure' Gemellus' cough. Claudius breaks the bad news that the statues of Caligula's brothers won't be ready in time for the celebration. Macro enters with the severed head of Gemellus just in time to save Claudius from death.

Antonia has finally had enough of this degenerate behavior and instructs Claudius on what to do with her body. But, after it's done, she's had her servant take care of it.

In the Palace, a very buzzed Drusilla is searching for her 'Zeusie'. She encounters Claudius and brags about her virile brother. She's been drinking a 'potion' that Caligula has mixed. She finally finds Caligula in his bedroom, which is decorated like the top of Mount Olympus. He's dressed in costume as Zeus. As he puts golden bracelets on her, he promises there will be no pain. He takes his dagger……

Episode 10 Hail Who?

This episode takes place in 40 and 41 AD - Claudius is in disfavor now and living out in town with Calpurnia, his mistress. She is, or was (?) a prostitute, but is obviously a goodhearted person. Claudius gets a letter from Herod and a little present - a set of loaded dice to "improve his luck". A servant brings in a flyer advertising a brothel in the Palace. The Senators and sons are to be the customers and the wives and daughters are to be the 'talent'. Claudius has been designated as doorkeeper.

The orgy is a packed house. Everyone's there and most have abandoned themselves in the moment. Claudius does throw out a couple to save the wife, but otherwise they all are in full swing. Caligula arrives and pretends to be disgusted. Claudius saves the day with some timely quotes from Homer. Caligula announces that he's off to conquer the Germans.

While Caligula is off at 'the wars' Claudius drops in on Caesonia, the Emperor's rather plain wife, and new baby. Claudius is to take a load of junk from the Palace to Caligula so he can auction them off to the provincials. It's a rainy day when they arrive at the camp in Germany. Apparently the 'god' Caligula is in a fight with Neptune and the local water gods. The rain must be an attack by them.

Caligula is irate that they came part way by sea and has Claudius dumped in the river. He climbs out however and some more apt Homer defuses the situation. Caligula insults Cassius Chaerea and the guard with "Give us a Kiss" as the watchword for the night. He and Claudius retire to have a chat. He reveals that he's the long awaited and prophesied savior of the Jews.

When Caligula returns to Rome, he's furious with the Senate because they did not order a Triumph for him, even though he had told them not to do so. He's going to kill them all when Caesonia and Claudius intervene. He proudly displays chests of 'loot' from his victory over Neptune (seashells).

Later, Claudius is summoned to the palace in the middle of the night. There they are 'treated' to a mock Greek play staring Caligula as a goddess. Afterward, Claudius is introduced to the seemingly innocent and virginal Messalina, who promptly wraps him around her finger. Caligula marries the pair as a joke. (Guest of Honor is the "noble Senator, Incatatus", the Emperor's favorite race horse.)

Finally, Cassius Chaerea and a few others decide to strike before they are themselves stuck down. Caligula is having a bad day at the games. He's been losing at dice until Uncle Claudius loans him the loaded dice from Herod. He gives 'thumbs down' to a defeated gladiator and the crowd boos. The conspirators lure him into an underground walkway and ambush him. "Here's for our wives, Jove." Back in the Palace, Cassius Chaerea and a guard execute Caesonia and the baby. Claudius is discovered hiding behind a curtain in the Palace by a group of the guards. Lacking anyone else handy, they hoist him up and proclaim him Emperor.

Episode 11 Fool's Luck

This episode takes place in 41 to 43 AD - Claudius has now been proclaimed Emperor by the Praetorian Guard. (He may have really protested as shown in this episode, but in real life he gave them a bonus.) They hold him under 'protective custody' in their camp as the Senate debates the return of the Republic. Herod arrives and very practically advises him to accept, "at least for the time being', or civil war will break out again and they will all be dead. Reluctantly, he does. He tells the Senators they may think him half-witted, "but at least I have survived with half my wits while thousands have died with all of theirs intact." He condemns Cassius Chaerea for the murder of Caesonia and the baby and the rest of the case is closed.

Messalina bears him two children in rather quick succession - Britannicus first and then Octavia. Meanwhile she's busy gathering the reigns of power. She helps him redo the Senatorial roles and takes over as Director of Public Morals. (What a laugh that one is!) It seems that she can get him to do anything she asks. She has her sights set on Appius Silanus, so she talks Claudius into recalling him from Spain to be his administrative assistant and mom's new husband. Herod returns to the East. He's King of Judea now. On his parting he gives Claudius advice. "Trust no one, my friend, no one."

Claudius orders the engineers to survey Ostia for all weather harbor improvements and, surprise!, finds that they've probably been bribed to over estimate the difficulty. Meanwhile, Messalina has made her pitch to Silanus. It's all a set up, she says, so that he can become her lover. Unfortunately for her, he has scruples and tells her that "I wouldn't touch you, lady, with a 10 foot pole." He, however, does believe her story about Claudius being in on it. After Tiberius and Caligula, these Emperors are capable of anything.

While they are in Claudius' office looking over the new plans for Ostia compared to those drawn nearly a century before under Julius Caesar, Silanus attempts to assassinate Claudius. He fails and is restrained by the guards. Messalina hurriedly tells her mother to back up everything she says, or else. They then rush to the Palace.

Silanus repeats the story that Messalina told to him - that he was brought to Rome to keep Messalina "amused". She twists the story completely around. He, she says, was the one who approached her. Domitia confirms the lie and Claudius condemns Silanus to death. Messalina begs for mercy - "Banish him," she pleads. But an attempted assassination cannot be punished that way. It must be death.

Messalina shoots Claudius a look behind his back that should leave you drooling for the next episode.

Episode 12 A God in Colchester

This episode takes place from 43 to 48 AD - It opens with Claudius absent from Rome undertaking the permanent conquest of Britain. Freed from any restraint, Messalina has run wild with lust. Her current favorite, Mnester, a Greek actor, proposes a "tournament of sex' which pits Messalina against the champion of the Guild of Prostitutes, Sylla. The participants gather in the Palace and, at three gold pieces 'a head' for Sylla the contest begins. Messalina wins, of course, and Sylla takes her rather heavy bag of gold coins and concedes. (They say Messalina was having such a good time at it that she continued on into the wee hours just for fun.)

All Rome is scandalized. Everyone knows except poor old Claudius. Any attempt to tell him has been countered by Messalina's manipulation, resulting in the death of the informer. She even gets Claudius to instruct Mnester to do "anything the Lady Messalina asks. Anything? Anything!" That includes setting her up with Gaius Silius, whom she promptly seduces.

Claudius' campaign in Britain was brilliant. The Senate votes him a rare Triumph. Meanwhile, in the East, Herod is planning a rebellion against Rome. The Governor of Syria brings news that he's building an alliance and fortifying Jerusalem. Apparently, he believes himself to be the Jewish Messiah. (The Governor reports briefly about the last failed candidate, a carpenter from Galilee, who was crucified during the reign of Tiberius.) The rebellion collapses before it's begun when Herod mysteriously dies after an evil omen.

Messalina and her new lover are plotting a rebellion of their own. She's been flaunting her relationship with him and apparently believes that Claudius is 'done'. While he is dedicating the new harbor works in Ostia she divorces him and publicly marries Silius. At last, someone must tell Claudius or it's curtains for everyone. Pallas and Narcissus enlist Calpurnia to do it. Reluctantly he believes them and orders the arrest of Messalina and her followers.

This time Messalina is barred from the chance to manipulate Claudius. They surreptitiously slip Messalina's execution order into a stack of papers that Claudius must sign. The guards arrive at her villa and offer her the dagger first. But, she's unable to use it herself, so……

Poor Claudius. He's had such rotten luck in wives. I wonder who he'll marry next?

Episode 13 Old King Log

This episode takes place from 48 to 54 AD - It opens with Claudius now dead and Nero and Agrippina searching for the will to ensure that Nero will inherit rather than Britannicus. They stumble across the family history and begin to read……

After Messalina's execution, both Narcissus and Pallas want Claudius to remarry and both have candidates to suggest. Pallas wins out with his backing of Agrippina the Younger, (He's also her lover,) who is Caligula's surviving sister and Claudius' niece. Claudius appears to not be concerned with the incest involved in this marriage and, tipsy, agrees.

Agrippina is obviously a shrew. She offers Claudius some interesting diversions, but he is "marrying you for your mind, not your heart." If he gives her power, she says, she intends to use it. That's what he has in mind. He wants her to help him govern. Still, there's something odd about this.

As time goes by, she turns out to be just as bad as predicted. She's the worst combination of everything. "Messalina with brains.", Narcissus says. Claudius seems not to care. He backs her and her sissy son, Nero, at every turn. He takes Nero's side against his own son, Britannicus. He even adopts Nero and marries him to his daughter, Octavia. Narcissus is having a fit. By doing this he's fallen into the plan she had in mind all along. Claudius explains that it's all been written (in the suppressed Sibylline verses) and can't be altered. He has a plan to restore the Republic.

He thinks he's been too good, he says, and has blunted the people to this monarchy. By choosing Nero, the people will rise up since he will be horrid. Britannicus, meanwhile, is to be spirited out of Roman territory and hidden by allies of Caractacus in northern Britain. Unfortunately, Britannicus doesn't buy into this plan and the whole thing falls through. Maybe he'll confound the prophecy.

Claudius, knowing the end is near, bids farewell to the Senate. He has an interesting trance where he sees all the departed family members as they were in his youth.

Agrippina finally pulls off the murder. She's been unable to get to him because of the protection of Narcissus. So, unable to poison his food, she poisons her own. When he wants seconds on mushrooms one night, she offers him the rest of hers and feeds them to him. He knows, but eats them anyway.

According to the Sibyl, Nero turns out just as bad as predicted. Nero eventually kills Britannicus, Octavia and his mother too. He'll be overthrown in the end. But the system is too strong, and goes on for another four centuries. Claudius has a million questions, but the Sibyl tells him it's his time to go, and her final words are:

"Farewell, Tiberius Claudius Drusus Nero Germanicus. God of the Britons. Onetime Emperor of the Roman World."